


Fuck you. Literally.

by orphan_account



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, M/M, Not Romance, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, they get pissed off and bone
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-02
Updated: 2015-05-02
Packaged: 2018-03-28 17:14:02
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,198
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3862867
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kageyama and Hinata meet each other, piss each other off, then use an alternative form of exercise from volleyball to get rid of their frustration.<br/>Kuroo and Kenma are literally just a mention in the background.</p>
<p>The title pretty much says it all.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fuck you. Literally.

**Author's Note:**

> As per usual, please have absolutely no expectations because I am 90% sure they will not be reached.

Tobio was as pissed off as he could get without actually trying to flip the table.  
In his second year of university, he had the misfortune of taking the same elective as a certain, rather annoying individual named Kuroo Tetsurou. They developed a distant sort of friendship, mainly because their preferred seats were next to each other. Well that and because Kuroo had really damn good notes.  
Sadly, it wasn't the sheer beauty of Kuroo’s notebooks that made him want to consider reenacting some of the moves he’d seen in MMA bouts. Kuroo and his… well Kenma was probably his official significant other by now… wanted to have their lovely little date night, but one of Kenma’s buddies had somehow managed to be included as well. The way Kuroo had explained it, Tobio would just have to even out the numbers and distract this person so that he wouldn't follow the two of them back to Kenma’s place and crash their two person party. It sounded pretty simple and he’d get a free meal out of it, so things would be great, right?  
Wrong.  
That grinning bastard had forgotten to mention something very important, that minor detail being Hinata Shouyou’s fucking personality. And he was going to pay dearly for it later, probably with notes from the entire semester. For now, Tobio focused his attention on not doing something that would make him wind up in a court room, no matter how much his chopsticks were beginning to look like possible weapons.  
It was painfully obvious that Hinata had no idea he was intruding on a date. Painfully.   
The other painful thing was having to sit next to such an oblivious person. Hinata was _loud_ and very bouncy. Tobio found himself wondering if the guy breathed helium instead of oxygen.  
“Ah, looks like Kenma had too much to drink…”  
Kuroo flashed his signature shit-eating grin and hauled a barely woozy looking Kenma to his feet.  
Asshole. Tobio knew Kenma had barely touched his drink.  
“We’ll go pay. You guys take your time!”  
And just like that, he was left alone with the most annoying fluff ball on the planet, well apart from his aunt’s Yorkshire terrier.  
He took a deep breath and did his best at being polite.  
“Oi dumbass, we should get going too.”  
Nailed it.  
“Hey what the hell is your problem, huh?! You’ve been all grouchy and stuff for the entire night!”  
No shit Sherlock. How about three guesses why?  
“That's just my face! Now lets go already!”  
“No way that's just your face, I swear you've been glaring at me for hours!”  
Great, so the little shit was perceptive too.  
“Argh, you’re so annoying!”  
“Hah! See, you do have some kind of problem with me!”  
“Shut up already! Noisy dumbass!”  
“Well you’re an asshole!”  
They stood there glaring at each other for a moment, then turned away with a huff to grab their coats. After leaving the restaurant, Tobio started walking down the street, only to notice there was a blob of orange in his peripheral vision.  
Was he still fucking there?  
Tobio whirled around and came face to face with Hinata’s sulky expression.  
“Oi, why the hell are you following me?!”  
“I’m not! This is the way back to my house too, idiot!”  
Tobio fumed at the logic.  
“Why exactly did you even come along tonight, seeing as you’re such a grumpy asshole and all?”  
Tobio gave himself a mental pat on the back for ignoring the lovely title he’d been given.  
“I’m here because Kuroo asked me to! He and Kenma wanted you out of the picture for a while.”  
“Huh?! Why?!”  
Oh god, he really was so dense.  
“He asked me to distract you so they could go home and bone each other in peace!”  
Hinata turned red and got quiet.  
“Ah.”  
Sadly, the shock value quickly wore off and his noise levels were back up to max almost instantly.  
“That doesn’t mean you have to be such a dick about it!”  
“Oh really? How about you stop being so damn obnoxious and then we’ll see how things go!”  
Tobio was getting really frustrated. Dammit, the guy was really good at pissing him off. He needed some kind of outlet.  
Usually, volleyball would be perfect. He could stand on the court and serve until his arm felt like it was going to fall off. Sadly, the gym wasn't open late on the weekends.  
Hinata was glaring up at him, the same kind of twitchy anger in his eyes. Tobio glanced around, noticed they were in the hotel district, and an idea popped up.  
There were other ways to exhaust himself physically, right?  
Looking back at Hinata, and obviously checking him out, it seemed like the same conclusion had been reached on his side. Hinata roughly grabbed his sleeve and dragged him in the direction of the closest hotel after finishing his own visual check.  
Tobio didn't even try to protest. He was too busy imagining how nice it would feel to wipe that stupid expression off his face.

 

Once inside, Hinata had thrown his jacket over a chair and marched into the bathroom, declaring ‘Don’t you dare chicken out on me’ as he went.  
Chicken out? Hah, no way.  
Tobio was really looking forward to reaming his ass.  
After a bit, Hinata came back out. His hair was damp and he was wrapped in a robe that looked two sizes two big for him. If it was someone else, Tobio would have probable thought it looked cute, but right now it only served to piss him off more.  
Wordlessly, he got up from his chair and took his turn in the bathroom, hoping to God that Hinata had the sense to do his own preparations. Tobio didn't want to waste any more time with that. He just wanted to get rid of his frustrations through some good, old-fashioned exercise.  
When he got out of the bathroom, towel wrapped around his waist, Hinata was sitting on the edge of the bed, robe half off. Tobio walked over to the table across from the bed, toweling off his hair.  
“Well, are we going to do it or what? I’ve got some pent up frustration that I’d be happy to lose.”  
“Fuck you.”  
“Umm yeah, that’s kinda why we’re here?”  
Ooh that did it. The little shit was gonna get what he deserved.  
Tobio marched forwards and grabbed the back of Hinata’s head, twisting his fingers harshly into the mess of orange and gripping it in a fist. He leaned down and mashed their mouths together, hearing a small squeak of surprise as he bit down none-too-gently on Hinata’s lower lip. But rather than being turned off, Hinata reached out and yanked the towel off Tobio’s waist while wriggling out of the rest of the robe. While he was busy doing the human equivalent of mauling Hinata’s face, Tobio felt something roll down over his dick.  
Ah, so this guy wasn't irreparably stupid after all…  
He pulled his mouth back for a second.  
“Oi. If you don’t have lube this is gonna hurt for both of us.”  
Hinata jerked a thumb over his shoulder and Tobio saw the bottle on the bedside table along with the empty wrapper for the condom he had on. Thank god these places came equipped.  
It looked like Hinata had already used some too.  
Good.  
Tobio pushed Hinata back on the bed and reached over him to grab the bottle, pouring the gooey stuff into his hand. No matter how many times he felt it, lube was pretty gross. Gross, but necessary. Luckily, he didn't have time to focus on that too much as he felt legs wrap around his waist and a hand reach up and squeeze. He let out a low grunt at the stimulation and glared down. Hinata was wearing a smug expression that Tobio swore must have been created just to piss him off.  
He knocked aside Hinata’s hand and coated the latex in lubricant, wiping the excess on Hinata’s stomach. Before the expected protest could be voiced, Tobio leaned down and kissed him again, starting to push his dick in at the same time.  
Hinata may be an annoying, loudmouthed idiot, but no one deserved an injury in that particular area. Well, maybe people like Hitler and that one kid who tried to push him down the stairs in kindergarten… But that was enough about them.  
After he’d pushed fully inside, he waited. There was no way he’d be the one responsible if things went seriously pear-shaped.  
“Are you gonna move or not?!”  
Tobio was 90% sure the snapping sound he heard was a vein in his head bursting. He jerked his hips forwards and roughly grabbed Hinata’s legs behind his knees, pushing them apart and forwards to gain better access. The noise he got in return was pained, but there was no request to stop so he elected to ignore it. He set up the usual rhythm he used when he only had his hand for company, essentially using Hinata’s ass as a fancy way to jerk off. He glanced down to see the owner of that ass dealing with his own arousal, eyes shut and panting slightly.  
Still not good enough…  
Tobio swatted Hinata’s hands aside and grabbed his dick, squeezing it tightly and roughly moving up and down, letting his fingernails scrape across the sensitive skin. Hinata bucked his hips up and threw his head back as his eyes flew open, a choked gasp spilling out as his mouth stretched into an ‘o’ of surprise and his legs jerked.  
That was much better.  
Tobio made use of the new position to fasten his mouth to Hinata’s neck, gnawing and sucking at the thin skin. He picked up the pace a bit, sitting up and watching as Hinata fell apart even more.  
Damn this was a good way to get rid of stress.  
Hinata suddenly glared at him and a defiant look passed over his face. Tobio gasped as the little shit clenched down around him, making him lose his pace. He glared back and put both of his hands on Hinata’s shoulders, then used his new leverage to _thrust_. The yelp he got in response was like music to his ears and this new angle felt amazing. He could feel himself getting closer, and by the way Hinata’s leg muscles were twitching every time he thrust in, he wasn't the only one. He let Hinata take care of himself, jerking off in time with Tobio’s thrusts until he came, muscles spasming and hips twisting as he tried to escape the sensation and get more of it at the same time.  
Tobio came soon after, waiting until he was completely done before letting himself flop down in a boneless heap over the equally jelly-like body beneath him. After they’d both caught their breath, Tobio turned his head to the side and caught Hinata’s mouth, too tired to do much other than bite at his lips half-heartedly.  
It was almost painful to admit to himself how satisfying that quick little bout had been.  
“Is your ass fine?”  
Hinata let out a small laugh.  
“Probably. Though I’m not sure how I’ll feel about sitting down for the next few days. Life isn’t fair. They say that shitty guys get tiny dicks but that’s clearly not the case.”  
“Huh.”  
They laid there for a while longer, neither of them really wanting to move until Tobio noticed the dark spots that were finally starting to show up on Hinata’s neck.  
“Shit. Um, do you own a scarf?”  
“… You’re joking.”  
“No. Do you?”  
“Kageyama are you fucking kidding me?!”  
Hinata threw him off and dashed to the bathroom on wobbly legs, voice getting louder and higher by the minute as he yelled profanities.  
Ah yes, he’d almost forgotten how bloody annoying this guy was when he wasn't being screwed senseless.  
“Even if I had a scarf it wouldn’t cover all these you fucking dickbrain!!!”

 

A few days later, Tobio was walking through the cafeteria when he noticed someone waving.  
Kuroo.  
He grinned. Time to get those lecture notes.  
After he walked over, food in hand, he realized he’d made a mistake. Not only was Kenma also there, Hinata was too. He was wearing a huge scarf and Tobio could see what looked like an attempt at makeup on his jaw. Not that either of them actually concealed anything. The multiple marks that were splayed out over his neck and jawline were practically in plain sight.  
“Sooo, do you have any idea what happened after we left the other night? Shorty here isn’t spilling anything about that impressive set of kiss marks he’s got. You know anything?”  
“He pissed me off and I took out my frustration.”  
Hinata glared at him like he just spilled some huge secret.  
What, was he not supposed to tell?  
“Hah! I knew it!”  
Kuroo looked like a cat that’d caught the canary. And the million-dollar koi. And the mouse. And whatever the fuck else cats like to catch.  
Tobio realized too late that maybe he should’ve just kept his big mouth shut.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you like it~ or endured it. either works. 
> 
> now im going to go hide in a corner.


End file.
